mars

I’m sorry, but it’s been a long time since I’ve talked about certain things. So I don’t know anymore—or I’m not sure. When I look at my life and its secret colors, I feel like bursting into tears. Like that sky. It’s rain and sun both, noon and midnight. You know, I think of the lips I’ve kissed, and of the wretched child I was, and of the madness of life and of the ambition that sometimes carries me away. I’m all those things at once. I’m sure there are times when you wouldn’t even recognize me. Extreme in misery, excessive in happiness…Each time I think of that flood of pain and joy in myself, I know - I can’t tell you how deeply I know that the game I’m playing is the most serious and exciting one of all.